Monday, October 31, 2011
We had our costume change in the lobby. She was very excited!
She walked in without total fear in her eyes. It may be because she knew she didn't have to go to the RTU.
She has been reviewing some pictures of Chase at clinic and I pointed out that he does it all by himself. So she went ahead and did it... pretty much. You could tell it was hard for her but she wanted to do it.
Acessing the port, always one of the hardest. She doesn't love it. Well, she doesn't love the cleaning and the bandage that goes over it. Not many tears though. It's getting easier.
Thumbs up for chemo. Keeping that Leukemia away!
We didn't have an appt in the RTU but she wanted to see Miss Lindsey (child life specialist). She loves her. They even hooked her up with a treat bag.
All done... and thrilled to be going home!
Luckily the drive home was pretty uneventful. We made it home in time for some festivities. I didn't want to take her out and put her hand in the bowls with LOTS of germs. We did our own thing... and I think she liked it!
(our attempt at a group pic... the kids were done)
Friday, October 28, 2011
Taleah requested Chloe and Ashley to come over for the CBC (blood draw). I was apprehensive at first because (1) I didn't want Chloe to be freaked out if Taleah cried (2) I didn't want Ashley to be freaked out (3) I didn't want to make it harder for Nurse Jeanette. Turned out that it was a good decision. Ashley kept Slade from crawling on top of us. Taleah was pretty brave and hardly cried. We made it "exciting". Ashley distracted Taleah with lots of songs. Hmm... good thing Ash was there or I know we couldn't have done it. Also, Chloe watched intently as her port was accessed. She didn't even flinch. Glad we made it through.
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
We had a great time this weekend. The weather has been amazing so we have been able to get out and enjoy things. Taleah was in heaven with the fun filled weekend. And I must say that Slade was a trooper through it all (minus night time).
She has been playing a lot of doctor lately. Everything she says is something that she has done. I have been asking her a lot if her head feels ok and if she has a fever. I suggested tylenol at one point when she complained of her head hurting and she quickly dismissed the pain and wanted NO medicine. I am afraid she won't tell me when she is hurting for fear of additional medicine. Also, while playing pretend she says, "Aww I have a fever. Take my temperature." I immediately panicked and felt her head. She said, "Mom, I am playing pretend." I asked her nicely to not play that kind of pretend to protect my blood pressure/heart.
I guess I am becoming more anxious of the next phase. I will start reading blogs of other cancer cuties and see what we are in for. Sometimes it helps...sometimes it makes my anxiety worse. One of my biggest fears is Taleah not feeling "normal". I am afraid that she won't get the social interaction that she needs. I need to stop being afraid. I know that Heavenly Father has a plan for her. I know that he knows what she/we can handle. Sometimes it is scary to put all my trust in him, but I still do. I know He knows me and my family. It's crazy because I have this feeling that she is going to be ok. No mother wants to think of the very worst for their child (death), but it is one of the effects of cancer. However, I have never thought of losing her. Maybe it is me being naive, but I have always had a feeling of peace amongst all the crazy feelings I feel. I know that is Heavenly Father giving me the peace I need at this time. It must be what I need to feel... to get through this.
I guess this post turned into an emotional one... again. It is my journal and I want to remember every step of this journey. I want Taleah to look back and see how strong she was.
5 more days of consolidation...
Thursday, October 20, 2011
It's so dumb, but when the surgeon explained that 1 out of 10 ending up having to have an additional step in the procedure... and giving me the rare thing that can happen....I automatically assumed that would be us. I had so many negative things going through my head. I don't know what my problem was. And I was a nervous wreck. Not sure why... I have done this a time or two.